1989 Mitsubishi Debonair V 3000 Royal AMG illustration
Those of you who seek out different sorts of vehicles are probably well aware of the Mitsubishi Debonair V 3000 Royal AMG, a lipstick’d pig that’s been internet forum lore since I got my first dial-up connection.
Most seem daunted by its apparent lack of “AMG-ness” as if being a German car tuning company holds the former purveyor of body kits and engine upgrades more accountable for their overseas licensing deals (don’t even get me started on the AMG upgrades to the fifth generation Honda Civic sedan).
In the 1980s, a Japanese automaker hooking up with a European entity behind the bleachers was all the rage: DeTomaso and Daihatsu; Honda and Land Rover (and Rover); Isuzu and Irmscher. Even Subaru and Porsche got together in the noughties.
Before Mercedes-Benz took a stake in AMG Motorenbau und Entwicklungsgesellschaft mbH, the tuning arm was free to hock its name and logo wherever it pleased.
You may think that this marvellous Mitsubishi is a black eye on AMG, but that would be foolish.
1989 Mitsubishi Debonair V 3000 Royal AMG brochure • Mitsubishi
In my mind, the car is almost more of a black eye for Mitsubishi, because not only was the standard Debonair a relatively unloved executive express to begin with, it wasn’t able (or willing) to ask their new German friends to make it go any faster.
The biggest mystery with this car is not what was made, but instead whose Rolodex was raided to organize the first boardroom meeting between AMG and Mitsubishi — and how many additional meetings were required before this project was put into production.
1989 Mitsubishi Debonair V 3000 Royal AMG studio shots — just look at this platypus of a car! • Mitsubishi
As a glorified appearance package, how was it not simply yet another car, decided on in boardrooms by men in grey suits trying their hardest to sell more Debonairs — even letting Hyundai build and rebadge it as the Grandeur.
Consensus often leads to the path of least resistance — the appearance package — and people like us can smell it a mile away. General Motors has traditionally given us some of the greats, like the Chevrolet Celebrity Eurosport VR, and in true phone-it-in fashion, the formula here is quite obvious: do the least amount of work possible, and make the logos big.
Period Mitsubishi Debonair V 3000 Royal AMG publicity photos • Mitsubishi
If you sold a few pieces of Tokyo property in 1989 and wanted to display your newfound wealth in the form of an all-white luxury sedan, opting for the AMG package on the Debonair would get you a new grille, body kit, white alloy wheels, rear spoiler, dual exit chrome exhaust tip, and steering wheel. Yay.
Since there’s nothing all that special about what’s underneath, does it matter that you know a then state-of-the-art 24-valve 3.0-litre V6 is underhood, with 197 horsepower? Probably not. Top speed, for the curious, is hardly an Autobahn-ready 215 km/h (134 mph).
Yet, like other quirky Japanese cars of this period, there’s something about this luxury sedan that doesn’t take itself too seriously. Badge engineered, sure — but done by some of the finest, laziest automotive engineers Germany had to offer in 1989.
For looking like a white SEGA Master System to performing like an Oktoberfest hangover, what’s not to love about this white whale of internet legend?
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